Stammered Gaze. Portrait of Patrick Campbell Stammering.

To prepare for painting the portraits, a collaborative process was undertaken:

1. Discussion stage.
2. How do you want to be portrayed?
3. What is your stammering aesthetic?
4. Where will it be set?
5. Photo shoot.
6. Painting and writing.
7. Are both people happy?
8. Publishing.

Stammered Gaze. Portrait of Patrick Campbell Stammering. Oil on board 9 x 12 inches. Painting by Paul Aston.

Patrick is a Doctor and a co-author of 'Stammering Pride and Prejudice, Difference not Defect'. Here are Patrick's thoughts on the painting:

'I wanted this portrait to tell my story of stammering. Stammerers do not always get the chance to tell own their story. We are typically type-cast into the role of tragedy, inspiration or clown depending on what seems to best fit the occasion. The gaze of fluent people often decides how we are seen and perceived. Here, I wanted stammerers to take control of the lens/paintbrush.

I chose the location. A local park I love with cute dogs. I tried to stammer on the letter ‘P’. The letter has been a source of anguish over many years as I introduced myself, but these days I try to see stammering as a part of myself, a part of my identity. ‘P-P-Patrick’. I chose a jumper that (in theory) I own but my girlfriend spends more time wearing than me. This reflects that stammering is a shared experience, sometimes an intimate one, with others.

In the background, you may notice a magpie or two sitting among the birch trees. I wanted my northern routes to be a part of the picture as well as my stammer. The magpie is Paul’s representation of this (the symbol of Newcastle United Football Club). The birch trees are Paul’s idea too. A pioneer species that often starts off a new woodland. Make of that what you will, apparently the original black pines of the park were too difficult to integrate into the portrait.

The scene for the portrait is designed by a stammerer; photographed and painted by stammerer; of a stammerer stammering. The stammered gaze.'

Giovanni Bellini St. Francis in the desert. Painted c. 1480 in Venice. Frick Collection, New York.

'I became fascinated by the expression on St. Francis's face in this painting by Giovanni Bellini. It seemed to mirror my experience of the temporary loss of control over my body while stammerin.' – Paul Aston.

‍Effects of Mr. Angry (my stammer) in school

• Tries to make fun of me.
• I know the answer but I don’t want to say it.
• I put in the wrong answer so I don’t get stuck.
• Sometimes act like I am thinking then when I am ready to say it I say it.
• In the yard I don’t do it all because I am not worried about him, just concentrating about what I am playing.